Reader Interactions


  1. Mahalakshmi says

    Fantastic job writing this article; so well articulated!

    Beauty, I’ve discovered, is a very fickle standard to live up to. Firstly, each culture has a different perception of what is beautiful. By the time we try to fit the mold, we’re not ourselves anymore. Secondly, the media only perpetrates a very stereotypical view of these impossibly thin runway and catalog models as the standard to aspire to be. But looking around me, I only see women and men in completely different physiques. And they are way more beautiful, because I can relate to them. The generous flair of someone’s hips, someone’s soft and plump cheeks, the way their teeth looks when they smile.. these are the things to unique to each person that I admire more and more today.

    I have recently reached this state of mind where I’m actually happy with my physique and features. To me, the best physical feature of mine are my eyes. Followed closely by my fingers, haha. My most favorite personality trait of mine is how I can quickly adapt to my surroundings.

    • LauraJ says

      There are a lot of actresses who I think are beautiful and they rarely get as much attention as some stars. It is so subjective and I think people forget what they actually think is pretty, because they are so busy watching others who are deemed to be.
      We only see one side of what’s out there – usually women of a certain colour, body type, facial features etc.
      It’s awesome that you are happy with yourself – both inside and out. You have gorgeous eyes and good hands (fingers even) help you age gracefully. 🙂

      Thank you so much for your words and for reading.

  2. Paolo B. says

    This was a really well done piece. I absolutely agree that self love is often the hardest. Everything out there is selling that you need to look, buy, do this or that to be “beautiful” when really it’s about loving yourself for who you are. You’re honesty and personal example is something to be proud of and I think can inspire anyone who reads this. Thanks for sharing Laura. Great post.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you!!
      I was saying to my friend the other day, how we have all the solutions to physical beauty…hair salon, dermatologist, nail bar, spa, beauty therapist etc, but with mental health or dealing with self-love, you’re left with tablets, an expensive counsellor (or waiting list) and perhaps a book.
      The options are so much more limited.
      I appreciate you taking time from your day to read 🙂

  3. jyo says

    Wonderful article, loved reading this. Trends are transient, it’s redundant to follow them. Instead personalise them. Use them as a reference point for inspirations. Because the only person u need look like….is you. Imperfections are what make you perfect.

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you!! Absolutely adore this reply. “Use them as a reference point for inspirations. Because the only person u need look like….is you”. Very, very true!

  4. Infinite Living says

    I love how you have brought together the 2 aspects – the passion, creativity and inclination to delve into matters of external beauty using make-up, outfits etc. and that of the internal beauty by pursuing health, well being and true joys with confidence – you have brought these together so very well. I so enjoy reading your honest post and agree with placing a balanced value on each aspect.

    • LauraJ says

      This was a really easy post for me to write because I had so much to say on the topic. And realising just how much external beauty affects us more than internal.
      It’s people like you, and your comments that make it all worthwhile. I’m glad that enjoyed reading and as always, you described my work so perfectly. Thank you for doing so and for reading.

      • Infinite Living says

        I feel absolute delight in the resonance I feel with your thought process on these subjects. I love reading your work that brings up my own perspectives so much better than I have attempted to. You are very welcome always 🙂

  5. Kerry LifeandLoves says

    Great post and I so wish everyone could see their beauty! I wish we could all keep the mentality that children have. Where they describe their friend as “really nice” or fun, instead of physical characteristics. We seem to all be pretty hard on ourselves, and can feel inadequate in what is termed as the ideal look etc. I think, as I have gotten older, I care less about what people think. Yes I would like to be a few pounds lighter, and yes I would like to have tame hair, but, my extra weight is the result of many laughter and fun filled nights out, and my hair courtesy of my beautiful Mum. Im ok with that. I instil in my boys to look beyond the physical, I hope that continues throughout their lives. I enjoyed this xxxx

    • LauraJ says

      That’s very true. Children never think to notice the physical traits first when they discuss their friends.
      I guess people need to promote products and the way to do it, is to make people think that they look inadequate. It annoys me when I see hair adverts and the woman has gorgeous, curly hair, then they straighten it dead straight and say look sleek whatever.
      Just one example of many! I’m sure your boys will remember what you tell them. Laughter and fun is worth so much more 🙂

  6. thatfeelinginside says

    I really enjoyed reading this post, love reading posts that make me look at things a little differently. Trying to love yourself is so hard sometimes but i’m really trying to x

    • LauraJ says

      I think it’s a long progress to find self-love and sometimes you don’t get there 100%. But keep trying – every step however small is good progression. Thank you for reading! 🙂

  7. Melina Elisa | Ivefoundwaldo says

    I never thought about it this way. You are so right, beautiful is actually for the most part a trend. Like you said there are people who are thought of as “traditionally” pretty because of the symmetry on their face, among other things, but I never thought of the fact that most looks go in and out of fads. Great post Laura xxx

    Melina |

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you! There are people who are just known to be incredibly beautiful regardless, but for the most part, when the media put someone in front of you enough and tell you its perfect, you start to believe it.
      And then you think of different countries and how much their ideals differ to ours. xxx

      • Melina Elisa | Ivefoundwaldo says

        omg have you ever seen that video going around how the “perfect” woman changes between countries. There are some countries that have similarities in terms of what they find perfect, but other countries that are so far off of each other. It’s so interesting to see!

        • LauraJ says

          Yes I have seen the video and I thought it was really interesting as well. Just how each country has their own ideals. xx

  8. Karalee says

    In high school I had a similar experience where I was bullied for my appearance, but I have learned to love myself since. I do not follow beauty trends because like you said they are always changing and I just do me!

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you for reading!! High school is the worst – I’m glad that you’ve learnt to love yourself since and have moved on from that experience. I think beauty trends should be picked – if you like it – follow, but otherwise move on. And as they say, there’s a difference between style and trend right 🙂

  9. Lise says

    This resonated with me in so many ways. I’ve never been up to any ‘universal’ beauty standards but I have felt that I look pretty at times, even without make up. My best feature is my fairly large eyes, so if I put on make up, most, if not all of the focus go to them and that’s what makes me feel most comfortable because I can ‘make up’ for everything else I lack because of that. I tend to love the looks of those who are ‘abnormal’, or outside the norm. I have always admired those who either dress in all black, those who are inspired by the medieval ages or anything like that. And I’ve thought that anyone with darker skin are so beautiful for the entirety of my life. Media rarely influences my opinion on beauty. Loved to read through this, it really got me thinking.

    • LauraJ says

      You have gorgeous eyes and the colour is so striking. I don’t think you need to make up for anything else, but I understand that we all have our own ‘thing’ like I always want to focus on my eyes and lips to detract from acne scars.
      I once saw Helena Bonham Carter and I loved that her makeup was not done to be ‘pretty’ and her outfit was not ‘normal’. Yet I thought she looked amazing.
      And it’s a shame that darker skin is not portrayed in the media – in fact a lot of people are left out. You would think that in 2018, things would have changed by now.
      So glad you loved reading and a huge thank you for sending me your input.

  10. Beyoutiful says

    Love this and totally agree! You have beautifully expressed what I was thinking and yes, being beautiful is always what’s on the inside more than the outside and I believe everyone out there is beautiful in their own way! Great post girl <3

    • LauraJ says

      Thank you!!! There’s nothing worse when you see someone beautiful and then watch them be rude, arrogant and lack basic manners. It just makes them completely unattractive. x