There’s nothing like a long-distance relationship to make you creative with sex. I’ve been in two – both required technology and good sexual imagination. Here are 6 ideas on how to seduce your long distance boyfriend when you’re not close by.
Match up dirty messages to dirty photos
Sexting about getting wet? Oh look, there’s a photo of you with wet hair after your shower. Enjoy temperature play? There’s a snap of you with an ice cube on your stomach.
Let’s be honest – how many times do we lie as we sext? I’ve sent dirty messages to partners before pretending I’m naked in bed when I’m actually wearing a hair turban, pj’s, binging on a TV show. Even if you’ve taken your snaps prior to sexting, it feels more ‘real’ to link your words with photos. Most people assume men are more visual but science proves all genders can feel sexual arousal through visual stimuli.
Before you pose nude
I believe when taking nudes you should assume the worst. Consider how you feel about your body being seen by someone other than your partner. If that thought scares you, perhaps keep your face and any identifiable traits (scars, tattoos etc.,) hidden. Also check in with your long distance boyfriend before sending. He could have his phone out next to his mum. Which reminds me of a time at Christmas, I was with family when my partner sent me one of my nudes back. While nice of him to tell me, he couldn’t stop staring at it, I nearly had a panic attack grabbing my phone from the table. (Luckily, no one else saw it).
Let his imagination run wild
If you want to avoid nude territory, try out ‘innocent sexting’. (Yes, I just penned that). This is where you allude to sex through photos without stripping. For instance, I use to sleep in my partner’s shirts while he was away. I remember wearing his work shirt alone with some of the buttons undone, messaging to say I’d had a busy day at the office. Another time, I artfully photographed myself watching Netflix with my legs and thighs on show (purposely hiding any signs of underwear).
You can flirt and turn each other on without having to always (if at all) strip bare. Experiment with what works for you.
Try a couple’s vibrator
If you’ve watched ‘The Bold Type’, you’ll know Sutton and Richard used one for their LDR. It’s a vibrator that your long distance boyfriend controls. Rather than self-pleasuring on your own, you can let your partner choose your vibrator’s speed and intensity. On Amazon, the Lovense Lush Bullet Vibrator is hands-free, quiet, has 7 different vibration modes and uses Bluetooth to connect long distance couples.
Role-play can feel embarrassing and intimidating. If you tend to shy away from it but secretly love the thought of playing a naughty nurse or a corrupt vampire (whatever floats your boat), you might find it easier over digital.
Firstly, look the part. Surprise your long distance boyfriend with a hot costume. Something that’s going to make you feel sexy. Your partner may have a sexual character fantasy, like the classic Princess Leia. When putting together a costume, don’t forget props. If you’re dressing as a teacher for instance, you may want to position yourself by a desk with some books and stationery. If you’re playing a powerful CEO, you again could be by a desk or table sipping a martini in the evening. Sometimes, cliches help.
In terms of what to say, think about a film or TV series with a character you can emulate. To take baby steps, you can start by simply addressing each other with your role-play names. Before videoing, plan a scenario. What happens in your role-play fantasy?
Read your sex fantasies aloud
If role-play isn’t your thing, here’s another way to express your sexual desires. Both you and your partner can write out what your fantasies are and then read them aloud to each other. As Metro suggests, you can write erotica. If you want to get more creative, share snippets of your story via voice note. You can spread out sections on different days to have him yearning for more.
Write a love note
The examples above describe seduction directly linking to sex. If we’re talking about seducing in terms of attraction; we need to include romance. Many times, I’ve been turned on by a partner sharing a funny story, complimenting me, discussing something he’s passionate about. A love note can become a sexy note, but I see it as a sweet gesture. A reminder to your long distance boyfriend: Your relationship is important regardless of separation.
Letting him know what his best traits are and how much he means will draw you closer and enhance intimacy. And that surly, leads to seduction.
How do you keep the spark with your long distance boyfriend? Find me on Instagram @thestyleoflaurajane